Reasons you always look bad in photos

“I’m not photogenic”

“I’ve never liked a photo of myself”

Have you ever said those things to yourself or out loud? I bet you have! I hear those words so often from my clients. For a lot of women, the first time they like a photo of themselves is during their boudoir session reveal. And I know why.

For starters, you have been staring at a reflection of yourself forever. When you put on your makeup, or check your outfit, or even catch a glimpse of yourself in a storefront window, you are seeing a mirrored image of yourself. This is likely what you’re comfortable with. The camera, however, is the opposite. The camera takes an image from the perspective of a viewer. So in short, you see yourself differently than how your partner, friends or family see you. This can sometimes be uncomfortable, similar to hearing your own voice on a recording.

Secondly, we don’t get to see what others see when they look at us. We don’t typically get to see ourselves in moments of full-belly laughter, after a bite of something delicious, or during sexual pleasure. All of those moments are incredibly beautiful and yet we don’t get to appreciate them for what they look like. For this reason, when I coach you through joy, desire, longing, flirtation, pleasure, and confidence, you might be surprised. You’ll finally get to see yourself in those moments of emotion.

Here’s a big one: you’ve trained yourself to hyper-focus on your perceived flaws and that’s what you look at first. This means you’ve lost the battle before you’ve even started. For some reason, you want to check the boxes on all the things you dislike about yourself in order to determine the value of a photo overall. I’m here to help you through that. I want you to look at a photo of yourself and see joy, see confidence, see beauty, before you see anything you might consider a flaw. I want you to look at a photo of yourself and remember how you felt in the moment.

Lastly, you think you have to look perfect in every photo. Have you ever paused a Netflix show? What are the chances that one moment looks perfect? Maybe you’ve seen some unflattering moments of your own, or have photos from unflattering angles. That’s okay. Photography doesn’t owe you perfection. None of us are perfect. I have stretch marks, blemishes, and a double chin, but I also have beautiful eyes and a smile that lights up a room. We all have features that make us unique. And our features do not have to be defined as flaws.

You deserve to have beautiful photos of yourself, right now, as you are. I hope the next time you look at a photo of yourself you fee much more than just your flaws, and look deeper into the purpose of the photo and what it will remind you of for years to come.